Humans Are Funny

“Hey Jake!” called Midge as she and Booker-T entered the yard at Jake's house. “Where are you?”

“I don't see him on the porch this morning,” said Booker-T. “Is today his vet day?”

“I don't remember,” said Midge. “He didn't say anything about it.”

“Wait and I will go peek in the house through the doggie door,” said Booker-T as he ran for the back yard.

Midge sat down on the porch and waited for Booker-T to come back to the front of the house. In a few minutes, he came running around the house and sat down next to Midge.

“He was sleeping,” laughed Booker-T.

“Still sleeping,” said Midge. “Jake is still sleeping. He never sleeps late.”

“Maybe he is sick,” said Booker-T. “He said he will come outside in a few minutes.”

“Okay,” said Midge.

Midge started pacing back and forth across the yard while she waited for Jake to come outside. In a few minutes Jake came around the corner and joined Midge and Booker-T.

“Hi Jake,” greeted Midge. “Are you sick?”

“No,” replied Jake.

“You don't usually sleep late,” said Booker-T.

“I was awake late last night so was sleeping late this morning,” said Jake.

“What happened?” asked Midge. “Why did you stay up late?”

“We need our beauty sleep,” laughed Booker-T.

“What beauty sleep?” laughed Jake.

“I don't think animals get beauty sleep,” said Midge looking at Booker-T with a puzzled look.

“Why?” asked Booker-T. “People get beauty sleep.”

“How do you know?” asked Jake.

“I hear my owner all the time saying that she needs her beauty sleep,” said Booker-T. “And she must be getting lot of beauty sleep because she is pretty.”

“Mine too,” said Midge. “Mine is pretty too so I guess she is getting lot of beauty sleep too.”

“How do you know they are getting beauty sleep?” asked Jake. “What is the difference between sleep and beauty sleep?”

Midge sat there a few minutes thinking. “I don't know,” said Midge. “I've heard my owner tell her sister the same thing. I've seen her sleeping and it don't look any different.”

“People are sure strange, don't you think?” asked Booker-T.

“I know,” said Midge. “My owner is always doing something strange. Do you know what she was doing last night?”

“What?” asked Jake raising his eyebrows and tilting his head.

“She was standing there in front of the TV on one leg,” said Midge.

“On one leg?” asked Booker-T. “Why?”

“I don't know,” said Midge. “I think she was trying to be a tree.”

“Why does she want to be a tree?” asked Jake.

“I think she is funny,” laughed Midge. “If you have to stand on one leg to be a tree, we would have to lift up 3 legs.”

“That would be really hard,” frowned Booker-T. “I can only lift one leg at a time. Can you lift up 3 legs at the same time?”

“I tried when she was doing it,” said Midge. “I fell over.”

“That's funny,” laughed Jake.

“She was doing a lot of strange moves,” said Midge.

“Was she exercising again?” asked Jake.

“I don't know,” said Midge. “This time she was different than she did the last time.”

“Was she dancing?” asked Booker-T.

“No,” said Midge. “You don't stand on one foot when you dance do you?”

“Some do,” said Jake. “I think they call it ballet or something like that.”

“Ballet?” asked Midge. “What is ballet?”

“My owner was watching a movie about some ballet person one time,” said Jake. “It is a funny dance.”

“Why is it funny?” asked Booker-T.

“The girl was dancing on her toes,” said Jake.

“Oh,” said Midge. “How do you dance on your toes?”

“I can't even stand on my toes,” said Booker-T.

“I can't do that either,” said Midge.

“They wear funny looking shoes when they are dancing on their toes,” said Jake.

“Some of their shoes are funny,” said Jake. “My owner wears these shows that make her taller.”

“Why does she want to be taller?” asked Midge. “Mine owner does the same thing.”

“Mine too,” said Booker-T. “Why do they wear the funny shoes?”

“Humans are funny people,” laughed Jake.

“They are really nice to us though,” said Midge.

“I think so too,” smiled Booker-T. “My owner gave me a home. I like it. It is better than living on the street.”

“Does your owner sing when she is taking a shower?” asked Jake.

“No,” said Booker-T. “She sings sometimes when she is playing the radio.”

“Mine sings in the shower and sometimes with the radio,” said Midge.

“Does she sing good?” asked Jake.

“Oh no,” said Midge shaking her head. “I thought the cats were outside howling when I heard her the first time. She isn't good.”

“Oh, funny,” laughed Booker-T. “Mine is pretty good when she sings. I like to hear her sing.”

“How about yours, Jake?” asked Midge.

“Mine don't sing,” said Jake. “I never heard her.”

“Hey you guys,” said Gabby as he swooped down from the trees. “What are you guys talking about?”

“We are taking about how funny humans are,” said Midge.

“Do you think humans are funny?” asked Booker-T.

“Humans are always funny,” said Gabby. “And they can't fly either.”

“Do you want them to fly?” asked Jake.

“Oh no,” said Gabby. “I think that would be bad. The sky would get too crowded with all those humans up there.”

“Then the sky traffic would be as bad as the ground traffic,” laughed Midge.

“I'm glad I don't drive,” said Jake.

“Why?” asked Midge.

“Cars are dangerous,” said Jake. “I see them going by the house very fast and sometimes I see two cars hit each other.”

“I guess Humans do funny things and sometimes dangerous things,” said Booker-T.

“I'm glad I'm just a four-legged animal,” laughed Midge.

“We are too,” said Jake and Booker-T.

“Lets go play,” said Midge as they walked out the yard gate.